Bella

Craig and I saw the movie Bella last night. I encourage you to go see it this weekend if its showing in a theater nearby. I was moved and pleasantly surprised at the movie's quality. I admit, I was expecting the low budget film to have a low budget feel. But it was beautifully done. Moreover, although it is a prolife film, I really think it can appeal to everyone, prolife or not.

The reason I say that is because the movie is very real. The characters and their problems are very real. Its not about the nonsense you see in the media, prolifers and proaborters arguing with each other with no real dialogue and sometimes no real solution. This movie was about real life and real situations and real solutions, not propaganda.

I've known more than enough REAL women hurt by abortion to know that life's problems can't be solved by debate or bumper stickers. Real women with real problems need real solutions. And somehow, prolifers need to be able to reach out and dialogue with those who think abortion is okay. I really think most people who see abortion as a solution do so because prolifers haven't offered enough real solutions.

When I was in the 6th grade, my mom met a lady one day while shopping. She was very upset and didn't speak English. After talking to her for a long time she found out this unwed mother from Mexico was pregnant and didn't know what to do. She had been staying with relatives but had been kicked out because of her situation. My mother drove this perfect stranger to our church on base. The priest told us about a home for mothers in crisis pregnancies, but it was a few hours away. That night the young woman spent the night with us and the next morning we drove her to this place run by sisters. I wish I knew the name but I don't. It was somewhere in southern New Mexico, I think. I just know it was a long drive. My father was on a remote tour for a year and my mother had to take both my sister and me.

We cried when we dropped her off. Mostly because she was crying. Our priest allowed us to take up two collections to mail to the sisters.

After the baby was born, we drove up to see her. The woman was so happy. I remember wishing I could do more so I gave her all my doll's clothes. I used to go to garage sales with my mother and would buy newborn clothes for my doll, Sally. Well, I gave Sally's clothes to this young mother and she was so grateful.

She ended up staying with the sisters for a year after the baby was born, while she worked as a housekeeper and worked on her citizenship & English. We eventually lost touch with her.

I wish I could say everything turned out great but I really don't know. But the mom was happy and I'm sure this little baby (who's now grown) is grateful for the gift of life.

I think being prolife means getting your hands involved with more than just signs and pointing fingers. It means helping these young mothers as well as educating young teens. A real solution will only be found when real people come in contact with those who are struggling with these real problems.

My mother taught me so much that year. She's never been to a prolife rally or held a sign or even been on a prolife committee. But she changed the life of a young woman and her unborn baby. I wonder how many times I've come into contact with someone in need and didn't recognize it or didn't take the time to help.

Go see Bella!!

* Sorry if I offended anyone with my views on how to be prolife. I rarely speak about it because I know many people who consider themselves prolife because they are activists. I also know a few women who have been hurt by abortion who wished they'd been helped. Those ladies needed a friend. I pray prolifers become friends in addition to being activists.

And remember to be charitable when speaking about abortion and women who have them. The women having them are the faithful ladies in your prayer group, RCIA or retreat team. At one time they were not practicing their faith and made a HUGE mistake. And they are sorry and feel ashamed. But they won't necessarily confide to a group. Those who seek abortions look just like us. They are our sisters and close friends who are carrying a heavy secret. And so we have to be very careful, charitable at all times, and willing to help at a moments notice because a precious life might depend on it.

*I just checked with my mom. My mom can't remember her name either because we knew her for such a short time. She thinks it was Casa San Jose Maternity Shelter in Grant, New Mexico.