.... but I'm also proud to say that this waking up early routine REALLY works!! I was up and showered BEFORE the girls came down for breakfast. They were fed, brushed their teeth and made up their rooms BEFORE 7:40am!! They have until 8:00 am before they are considered tardy. And now it is 1:30 pm and all school work is done (minus Belle's piano practice). Everyone has read silently and aloud. Anna practiced the piano. Kolbe and Sophia were read to and we still have enough of the day to play (or do laundry ... depends who you are).
But I'm also on my second cup of coffee!! I'm feel tired. But its a good tired!!
What's my secret (besides setting the alarm)? Well, I started thinking back to when I was in the 4th grade. I LOVED my 4th grade teacher, Mr. Tipton. He was such an awesome teacher. We did lots of fun, hands-on learning. He allowed us to whisper to each other in class while doing homework. We had a buddy system where he sat us in groups of three and if we didn't understand, we could ask each other before asking him. He didn't mind our talking AS LONG AS he wasn't teaching.
And he gave us so many incentives to do our best. And so, I've decided to implement a rewards program for our homeschool. Here's how it looks:
Everyday the girls must be at their spots no later than 8am. And they should have a good attitude during their school work. If they do these two things they get a sticker on a chart. For every 5 stickers they get a Smith-Buck.
On Friday's "Mom's Store" is open and they can buy items with their Smith-Bucks. I have my store fully stocked (thanks to Michael's and The Dollar Tree) and the kids can't wait until Friday. They haven't seen what is for sale so the anticipation is killing them.
What I love about this system is that now my job is to catch them being good. If they aren't on time or decide to have a bad attitude, its their problem. Not mine. They don't get the sticker. They don't get to spend as much (or even at all ) on Friday. And I no longer have to scream, nag or threaten to get results.
I really love how St. John Bosco disciplined in such a positive way. And I want to model my parenting and teaching after him.
I didn't feel like the cop today. Rather, I was the loving mother who delighted in their successes. And they had more of a filial fear (rather than servile) of disappointing me.
At my discretion, I told them I can give out Smith-Bucks whenever I "caught" them being extra good.
And so today, when three little girls were sitting in their spots 20 minutes before starting time, my heart melted and I gave out three Smith-Bucks!!
I can't wait until Friday!!
** My dh loves this system too. Because its not bribery. And it has nothing to do with their performance on their school work. I am simply focusing on cheerful dispositions, promptness in starting school in the morning, and little acts of kindness.
Dear God, thank you for giving me a wonderful 4th grade teacher in Mr. Tipton. And thank you for the wonderful example of St. John Bosco.
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9 comments:
I love it! Way to go!
Cool idea! I have been paying the children to do jobs I don't want to do.... like cleaning up dog poop - blecht. I don't approve of any of the things they want to buy, or even the books they want to buy.... so setting up my own store would be perfect. Plus, I wouldn't need to keep pulling dollars out of the junk drawer. Thanks for the great idea..... I am totally all over this.
Awesome idea, Lillian. I need to implement something like this in our house!
Good for you, Lillian! I, too, find that my homeschool days run more smoothly when I am up early (and before the kids)...but I am a night person, so getting up early is a challenge for me.
I love your system of positive discipline...I was with you on the duct tape discussion on the MODG loop...simply awful, IMO. So you weren't alone there!
Okay,I give up (after googling MODG and duct tape to no avail). You aren't suggesting that duct tape was being suggested as a method of discipline, are you? And just how might you use duct tape to subdue children? I might be interested. (Just kidding)
I was curious too Emily... I didn't go Googling, (even though that's my first stop too!) but my curiosity was piqued by that comment...
OK Lillian, spill it!
A mom on a loop I belong to was sharing how she dealt with her teenager daughters when they would bicker or argue during school work. She would use duct tape on their mouths while they wrote out bible verses!! *GASP*
I was appalled and couldn't believe anyone would use duct tape as a form of discipline. And especially with teenagers. I know I don't have any yet, but I can't see how that respects the dignity of any child, especially one about to become an adult!!! And I'm sure this could be considered child abuse.
I'm always amazed by those who think they can scare, force or parent from a purely negative or punitive perspective.
As if we, as adults, would perform so much better if our co-workers or bosses were treating us like that. But for some reason parents forget to think about the dignity of their children. I love how St. John Bosco points out that some parents can forgive themselves all their faults while expecting perfection from their children and not forgiving them at all.
That's all that was about.
Normally that Yahoo loop is WONDERFUL!!! It is strictly about MODG stuff. That discussion was VERY off topic and the moderator addressed it promptly. But I was still appalled because this mom was actually sharing this because she thought it might be helpful to other homeschooling moms dealing with talkative/arguing teenagers.
*sigh*
Thanks for the explanation. Hmmmm. Interesting. Reminds me a bit of a mother in the Catholic homeschool group near our old town who got frustrated with one of her children during homeschooling time and threw a pencil at him. The pencil lodged in his forehead, literally.... as in the pencil stuck straight out from his head in mid-air. This whole thing was not hard to believe as I have witnessed other "disciplining" techniques that she has employed. Not sure how a person can reconcile these methods with the Catholic faith but she seemed to feel pretty confident that all children "needed" such treatment to become contributing members of society someday.
Anyway, thanks for the dirt. I haven't exactly been at the top of my game lately and while a little self-riteous indignation probably isn't going to get my house clean and meals on the table ... it sure makes me feel better!
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